Tony v. Fear

Tony Soprano has few values, but these values contribute to the way that he lives his life. However, most of the time, Tony feels that he has low control over what is happening to him. His controls and values heavily dictate the emotions and motivations that he portrays. An example of the Control-Value Theory playing out in Tony Soprano’s past, deals with his childhood, and his mother of course. His mother has always been a major effect in his life - her manipulation, her criticism, and his need for acceptance from her. Livia Soprano was a selfish and miserable woman who could only express her emotions in a way that tore Tony down. 

Tony is constantly haunted by his childhood, feeling like he has to act a certain way, have a certain lifestyle, and value certain things because that is what occurred in his childhood. He is consistently reflecting on his mothers manipulation and his father’s violence in the mob world and towards Tony himself. The fact that Tony continuously refers back to his childhood shows that he feels like he had little control over the way that he turned out. Tony feels like his environmental upbringing is what “made him this way,” creating low perceived control. However, because he has such a high value on family, he accepts what he has gone through and deems that it was the only way for him to become the man he is today. He has a strict idea of how being the “good son,” looks in his head and he constantly tries to live up to that for his mother, but guilt trips him every time into him thinking that he is not. The mixture of the low control and high value creates extreme frustration, discontentment, and guilt. He has deep regrets about his life and how it turned out, feeling trapped by his past and his mother. These feelings create motivation for Tony to start seeing a therapist (Dr. Melfi). Due to Tony’s emotions, he wants to try to regain control of his life before it is too late and before he is too far down the wrong path. 

The Control-Value theory also plays a crucial role in his future. Because of Tony’s line of work, he never knows what is going to happen. The one thing that he does know for certain is that everything can change in one second. He is constantly fearful that something is going to happen to him that takes him away from his family. He is constantly anxious about what is going on in the mob world and people breaking his loyalty. With that being said, he has a low perceived control over the future as he knows that anything could happen: between him dying or someone  flipping. His value is still high, as he wants his reputation to be remembered as a strong leader, good father, and a family man. He is constantly facing fear and debilitating anxiety because he does not know what is going to happen next and he feels like he is losing control and not able to set his values the way he wants them to be. The motivational effect that stems from all of this is that he needs to become more defensive, protective, and secretive in order to protect and manage the unknown.